When Parents Oppose Your Choice to Be an Artist

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When Parents Oppose Your Choice to Be an Artist

Many young people have faced opposition from their parents when they've decided to be artists or musicians, but not many had it as bad as Hector Berlioz (French composer, 1803-1869).

When he was still a teenager, he started training in Paris for the medical profession. But he realized that he loved music too much to follow that path, and told his parents so.

"My parents called upon me to choose some other profession, since I did not choose to be a doctor. I replied that my sole desire was to be a musician, and that I could not believe they would refuse to let me return and pursue my career at Paris." 

The young man "fell into a sullen silence, but father eventually relented and agreed to let him go, saying 'You shall go to Paris and study music; but only for a time. If after several trials you fail, you will, I am sure, acknowledge that I have done what was right, and you will choose some other career. You know what I think of second-rate poets; second-rate artists are no better, and it would be a deep and lasting sorrow to me to see you numbered among the useless members of society." 

Portrait of Berlioz in 1855 by Richard Lauchert

His mother became angry when she found out his father had allowed him to pursue music.

"She was convinced that, in adopting music as a career (at that time music and the theatre were inseparably connected in the minds of Frenchmen), I was pursuing a path which leads to discredit in this world and damnation in the next."

She said "'Your father has been weak enough to allow you to return to Paris, and to encourage your wild, wicked plans; but I will not have this guilt on my soul, and, once for all, I forbid your departure." 

When she kneeled before him and begged him not to go, he insisted "'Well, then, go," she said. "'Go and wallow in the filth of Paris, sully your name, and kill your father and me with sorrow and shame! I will not re-enter the house till you have left it. You are my son no longer. I curse you!"

Berlioz later reflected that he could never forget that "painful, unnatural, horrible scene," and it solidified his resolve to overcome many obstacles later.
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Book: The Memoirs of Hector Berlioz
Wikipedia: Hector Berlioz

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